The Poly-tangle

 Time isn't always easy, but the people you are around can make every difference in the world. Eight years ago, I fell in love with one of my current partners. Yes, I have more than one partner.

It was a cold morning with the sun rising a bright yellow through the trees. I was standing alone, staring into the cluster of trees; waiting for the bell to ring for the start of the first period. As I was lost in my thoughts, a person approached behind me and started a conversation. This started a morning ritual that would last until they had to leave the area. 

Heartbreak led me to meet and fall in love with someone else. Despite being deeply in love and happy, I couldn't rid myself of the longing and overwhelming emotions I still had for my first love. No amount of time would fade the love I had for either of them. That was the first time I realised I am polyamorous. 

Although being in a relationship with both of them made me happy, one of my partners left the country for work, and after trying a long-distance relationship, it became too painful for all parties involved. Since then, we went a long time without including another in our relationship... until this year. We started to date, only to go through some bad experiences, until this weekend.

This weekend, we introduced someone into our relationship. Despite my mental health problems, I don't think I've ever been as happy as I am when I spend time with them both. The new addition has honour, kindness, strong morals, and is caring and protective. He is sweet and open-minded, looking after us whenever we need it.

Being in a polyamorous relationship comes with its obstacles, but it is important to not give up and be honest about your emotions. The beginning of a polyamorous relationship - and you can correct me if I am wrong - is about figuring out the dynamic, not just between all parties involved, but also between each couple within the relationship. 

Each person will communicate differently with each person. N and C (the new addition to our relationship) communicate in a playful way; winding each other up through flirting and banter. I and C communicate through body language and talking about things we are passionate about. N and I communicate in similar and different ways from the others. It is important to explore what each of you is comfortable with and not comfortable with and make time for not just being all together, but being in couples and individuals. Each person has their own specific needs. 

Each relationship is also different. The relationship between us three is completely different from each of the other relationships we have been in. We all have our own different needs. However, we are all each other's support network and do what we can to look after each other. 

If you have any questions or would like me to do more posts about Polyamorous relationships - including mine - make sure to drop a comment or two :)

As always, stay safe, and stay well. 

Jace.