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Monday, 20 October 2014

Relationships

I have been asked quite a few questions since I started this blog but one that I have only actually received once is relationships.
More specifically, am I currently in one and how does it work. I have been close to a girl for some time but we haven’t been going out. Well today I finally asked her out and she said yes. This got me back to thinking about the questions that I was asked and what I think.
So first things first, do I think autism makes relationships more difficult, yes, do I think it takes a special kind of person to have a long lasting relationship with a spectrum dweller, absolutely. But not once would  say that someone on the spectrum won’t be able to get a girl, it make just take a little extra searching but when you find that girl you’ll be happy that she is willing to accept you the way you are. I do not think that anyone on the spectrum has to lie about it to find a girl, after all she has to know at some point and it is so much easier if she knows from the beginning. 
With that said I don’t think it is a good idea to attempt to use this as a means of getting let off with things that she wouldn’t usually put up with.  Don’t get me wrong, every relationship has its bumps and I know that will be the case for me too. I just think it’s important that when you have done something wrong you just put your hands and admit to what you have done, say sorry and try your best not to do it again. I do think it’s important that anyone who chooses to be with someone on the spectrum that the person you are with can be impulsive, often won’t understand their feelings and this can cause them to lash out. Opening the lines of communications is essential for any relationship but even more so when a spectrum dweller is involved.

Thanks are reading and a little patience can go a long way and you will be rewarded for it,

Ben.


Also on a side note, I am thinking of making a Facebook page that I can use to tell you all when I have posted, this way only the people that want to read my blog will get notifications for it, if you think this is a good idea can you let me know, thanks again.

2 comments:

  1. Great post Ben. I think this is something a lot of parents will wonder about at some point for their children, I certainly did. Of course for some, relationships won't be given a second thought and they'll be just as happy without, but nice to get a young persons perspective on it :)

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    1. Thank you,
      I agree that relationships are not the most important things to everyone, i know the aren't to be but it is nice to know that i can get one. I can only hope that more people with autism either find the right person or just don't care about it because it can be very depressing when things don't work out.

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