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Wednesday, 10 June 2015

Becoming An Adult

Yesterday I took to Facebook to find out what it is you all want to hear. I got a few responses but one struck a chord in me. The question of becoming an adult, puberty, hormones and all of that goodness. Now the transition into adulthood isn't an easy aspect of life for anyone to handle, but for someone on the spectrum it can be a nightmare.

Personally I really struggled during this time, I didn't get as tall as I wanted, I had feeling I couldn't control, feelings I couldn't even understand. Naturally this lead to frustration, annoyance and anger. The anger wasn't pointed at anyone, just at the world in general. Another emotion that I felt was fear, during my younger teen years I felt scared a lot. This then also lead to me lashing out a lot to the people around me. But it's not all bad, I have grown up, matured, become able to speak about my feelings. I've also learned many life lessons. I have become my own individual.
When I was 15-18 I had a mosher phase. My mum was supportive of me during this time, she helped me choose clothes, I dyed my hair with her help and many other things. My dad on the other hand didn't like the fact that I chose to change my appearance. He wanted me to stay the same mainstream, normal lad that I was. Obviously that didn't happen. I have come out of that phase for the most part but I retain some of the attributes. I like my hair longer, I still like rock and even screamo. I've even kept some of the jackets and clothes.
By being part of the "alternative style group" I learned some things, I learned to be myself, dress how I want and enjoy what makes me happy. These days I choose shirts, jeans, even ties from time to time because that's what I enjoy to wear. I like to wear v-neck jumpers sometimes and hoodies others.
The point I'm trying to make is that the teenage years are hard, but it is in those years that a person really becomes themselves. When they decide the kind of lifestyle that they want. I believe that it is the most critical time to support your child. I have many insecurities, I'd say half are linked to my dad, a quarter linked to being bullied when I was younger and the rest a mixture of peer pressure and media. Now imagine, if my had just openly supported me, there's a chance I could have only had half of the insecurities that I do now.


Thanks for reading,


Ben.

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